It's my period and I'll bitch and moan and whine if I fucking want to.
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Date: Wed Jul 20 22:42:16 PDT 2005
Location: home
Music:
QOTD:
Mood: tired
Breakfast: 1 bowl cocoa rice cereal with rice milk, 1/2 cookie, some lemonade.
Lunch: 1/2 of a footlong veggie sandwich with cheese.
Dinner: cheetos, a cookie, and water.
Any snacks: popcorn, 2 cookies while at work.
Some months when I'm PMSing, I crave nothing but Chinese food. Other months, it's chocolate. This month it's been pizza and popcorn and cookies. I even went back to eating 'natural' Cheetos, but honestly I prefer Trader Joe's cheddar popcorn now. Who'da thunk that I'd ever not like Cheetos anymore??
I've been extra bitchy this month, too. It doesn't help matters that over the
past nine days, the company I am contracting for has experienced two rounds
of layoffs, and everything's changed and half the management is missing. Many other people said 'fuck that noise' and up and quit.
Anyway, back to george. He arrived Sunday July 17th but quickly went
away again. I'd walked 7 miles that day for the annual San Francisco
AIDS Walk, and then I came home and drank 1/2 a bottle of wine with
a friend. Alcohol always makes George go away. It's something with the
interaction with hormones and alcohol. Technical stuff I can't explain
very well, but stuff I've read about and understand on a cellular level.
On Monday July 18th in the evening, George returned. I'd been VERY
emotional and ragey all day, and when he arrived, I experienced some
pain in the lower back and abdomen.
Yesterday the 19th, George was heavy all day. I went to work anyway,
and I took a 600mg Ibuprofen first thing in the morning. I think that
worked well - I was ragey and depressed as hell because of more firings
at work, so I left early, and the cramps didn't set in til I was nearly
home. Once home, the pain got worse. I cried from george and frustration
of the workplace, then took a Tylenol 3 and went to bed. Oh, and there
had been moderate clotting, just to note.
This morning, george again tried to kick me in the stomach, but I
took another 600mg Ibuprofen and decided I'd try to go to work
again. I figured if horrid pain hit me, I'd be better off at work
than staying home, because construction was going on in the hallway
outside my apartment, complete with buzz-saws and hammering.
Turns out george didn't bother me so badly again today; not until
5pm again. I couldn't leave early today, so I popped yet another
600mg Ibuprofen. The cramps were stronger this time though, and
took awhile to settle down. Lots of clots today, too.
Got home from work and I've been on the computer for most of
the night, moving files around. I'm doing laundry, too. Despite
being very tired, I have a lotta shit to do and george isn't
impairing me too badly, so I'm doing the chores that need to be
done. I even ran a load of dishes.
Oh - I need to bring up that protein bar that I ate last month, because not only does it have chocolate in it, it's full of partially hydrogenated oils and corn syrup!!! In a fucking protein bar! Balance bars are once again on my list of Eeeevil foods.
That's about it. More later.
Date: Sun Jul 24 14:24:50 PDT 2005
Location: home
Music:
QOTD:
Mood: scattered, agitated
Breakfast: 1 bowl cocoa rice cereal with rice milk. 2 eggs, scrambled, with spinach and soy mozzarella cheese, wrapped in an organic flour tortilla, with salsa. 1/2 glass lemonade.
Any snacks: 1 chocolate chip cookie, 1 See's candy "mint crispy" wafer thingy.
Sorry for not being up on it again...four days to try to remember now, Bad Steph!
Ok, so on the 20th, I had a burst of energy and "MUST CLEAN!" attitude.
George had gone away during that night, too.
The next day, ten minutes after I got into work, I felt george had returned,
and I felt the first twinges of cramps.
"No worries," I thought, and popped a 600mg Ibuprofen pill, the same as
I had done the previous two days.
Well, this time I was wrong. This time, george had his way with me.
Within 6 minutes of popping the ibuprofen, george had the cramps turned
up to 11. I grabbed the heating pad I'd just happened to have with me
because I'd expected such unruly cramps the day before and never got them.
I waited for the medicine to kick in.
I waited an hour from onset of cramps before I declared defeat, and
went home. I cried from the pain part of the way home, too. Fucking
bastard. But I knew I'd rather brave the hour-long drive home than
to stay at work and ride out the cramps. I knew that the intense pain
of the cramps would leave me fucking tired, too.
About 15 minutes from home, I popped the Tylenol 3 (I couldn't recall
if it's okay to mix ibuprofen and T3, so I'd called the pharmacy to
inquire before I'd left work, and they said it's okay).
I got home and ended up sleeping for most of the day, of course.
On Friday, I went to work. George was off and on in light flow all
day. We had work-imposed Mandatory Fun, which was an outing to the
bowling alley. This is cruel irony, because the new boss in charge
was the very same boss who had fired me minutes before Mandatory
Fun...at a bowling alley...last year. So I was a bit nervous and
wondered if I'd end up pissing her off again somehow. Of course,
I was on her team for one of the sets, too...and yes, I did say
something that agitated her, even though I thought it was totally
benign. Whatever. Nobody else thought anything of it. She's the
unbalanced one, not me. All I did was tell the group that I'd
think of an annoying product line and that would motivate me to
bowl a strike. I got giggles from the rest of the group...
Right so...at bowling, george hated me for hefting bowling balls,
but I ignored him and drank two beers, instead. My lower back was
aching like hell, too, but I made it through the day.
Friday night, george went away again. I stayed home though, and
caught up on some journaling and other stuff, and watched director
commentary to Army of Darkness with my bf.
On Saturday, we had a protest to go to, and since george was gone
again, we decided to walk to the event, which was about a mile away.
Yahoo! Weather had promised a topping out of 79 degrees fahrenheit
that day, too.
Well, george returned AGAIN! Only spotting, but still some cramping
and much lower back pain. This REALLY pissed me off, because he was
supposed to have been gone by Friday!
As we hung out at the protest, it got hotter and hotter out. I
had wished for some ibuprofen at one point. After two hours,
the demonstration petered out, and so we made the trek back home.
I declared that Yahoo! Weather had lied to us, and I further
declared that it was 89 degrees outside. We walked to our favourite
tea house and I had some organic lavender-lemonade to cool down.
We must have stayed there for at least an hour before we whimpered
that we really should walk the rest of the way home. I apologised
profusely to myself and to my bf for insisting that we walk to
get some exercise, because we'd just walked about 7 miles last
Sunday, and the Sunday before that, we bicycled 15 miles.
My bf was thankful for the exercise, as was I, but we both
complained about the heat. We finally got back to the apartment
and I stripped down to my underwear and collapsed on the couch
in front of the fan. After a time, I got up and checked the
weather. The high for the day was supposed to be 79, but the
mercury far surpassed that within two hours. Yahoo! Weather
had revised their high of the day for our town to 86 degrees,
and again, the mercury surpassed it. The temperature by 3:30pm
stood at 88 degrees, one degree less than I'd declared it to
be about an hour earlier while out walking in it.
But more than that, the mercury had risen TEN DEGREES IN TWO HOURS
that morning!!
ugh.
Anyway, back to george. He was off again, on again all day on
Saturday, and then went away last night. I think he's gone for
good this month. I don't want to see that bastard again..or at
least for another THIRTY days. Motherfucker.
That's all for now.
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